Transactional Analysis: the Theory and Examples
Transactional Analysis: this article explains the Transactional Analysis, developed by Eric Berne in a practical way. It also gives examples and covers Transactional Analysis Therapy, the different egos, the role of strokes and two communication levels Berne distinguishes. After reading, you will understand the basics of this communication theory. Enjoy reading!
What is Transactional Analysis? TA explained
Transactional Analysis (TA) is an approach within social psychology that was developed in the late 1950s by psychiatrist Eric Berne (1910–1970). He wanted to get rid of complicated, difficult-to-understand therapeutic language and sought a way to describe human behavior and relationships in simple, understandable terms. Instead of focusing primarily on invisible inner processes, he focused explicitly on what people do and say when interacting with each other.
Transactional analysis is based on the idea that everyone has three so-called ego states: Parent, Adult, and Child. Transactions, i.e., exchanges of words, behavior, and reactions, are entered into from these states. The experiences a person has had in their early life form the basis for decisions about themselves, others, and life. Together, these form a personal script, a kind of unconscious program that later recurs in work, relationships, and communication and influences the quality of life experienced.
TA is therefore both a personality theory and a practical method for examining behavior and communication. The concepts and models have been deliberately kept simple so that they can also be used directly outside the therapy room. This makes transactional analysis ideally suited for coaching, training, team development, and self-exploration. In conversations about collaboration, leadership, or personal effectiveness, TA offers a clear language for recognizing patterns and making more conscious choices.
Worldwide, there are various courses and training programs based on transactional analysis. The same goal is always central to these programs: to help people gain more insight into their own script and communication patterns, so that they are less influenced by old automatic responses and can act more from a mature, free choice.
Egos and the transactional analysis
Berne distinguishes three different ways to experience the world around us in Transactional Analysis. Based on these three perspectives, people behave differently depending on the situation. These are called the egos, in which thinking, feeling and behaviour are the main factors.
There’s the Parent, the Adult, the Child, which can be compared to the Winner (parent), Loser (child), and the Neutral (adult). These three egos are present in each person as well. The Child and Parent are rooted in the past. The Adult handles based on the presence.
Each ego can interact with others. Eric Berne calls that transactions. Within Transactional Analysis, such a transaction is two-way communication. On the one hand there is the actual and intended communication, and on the other there’s the implied psychological sublayer.

Figure 1 – The ego’s of the Transactional Analysis (Berne, 1958)
1. Parent Ego
The Parent ego is the deeply rooted voice of authority that people think, feel and express in the way parents do towards their children. The nurturing Parent ego stands for power and authority, and is pedantic and know-it-ally. The Parent ego is judgemental, critical and uses patronising language. The ‘raised finger’ is typical for this ego.
2. Adult Ego states
The Adult ego lives in the here and now, according to the Transactional Analysis theory. This ego has the ability to carefully think and take action based on available facts and data. If you want to change the Parent ego or the Child ego, it’s best to do it through the Adult ego.
This ego is verbally skilled and asks many open-ended questions and bases its opinion on facts. The Adult ego also makes comparisons to other situations in order to form an objective opinion. The most important characteristics are showing interest in others, emphatic ability and patience.
3. Child ego states
The Child ego thinks, feels and behaves like a small child. This can be positive; for instance feeling excited about an upcoming holiday. Often though, it’s expressed negatively in the form of difficult behaviour, disagreeing with others, wanting to get their way, rude behaviour or anger and rage.
Emotion takes over the Child ego and removes all inhibitions. The Child ego enjoys bragging, twisting the truth and making things seem worse than they are to impress others.
Strokes
Each person has a need to feel noticed, appreciated and liked by others. Eric Berne has described this need for attention as wanting strokes. There are different ways to get strokes and they can be either positive or negative. That’s also the case for the two meanings of the word ‘stroke’; ‘gentle touch’ and ‘hit’.
By using an action or words to elicit a response from someone, you get a stroke. That makes a stroke part of a transaction. On the one hand, people get recognition through positive strokes such as compliments, friendly remarks and encouragement. On the other, people can also receive negative strokes in the form of humiliation, cynicism, hatred etc.
Life positions: I’m OK, you’re OK
Life positions play a central role in transactional analysis. They describe the deeper perspective through which someone views themselves and others. This perspective often develops in childhood and later largely influences communication, choices, and relationships automatically.
Transactional analysis distinguishes four basic positions. The first position is I’m OK, you’re OK. From this perspective, a person sees themselves and others as worthwhile and basically good enough. There is room for difference, dialogue, and cooperation. This is seen as the healthiest and most mature basis for contact and joint problem solving.
The second position is “I’m not okay, you’re okay.” From this perspective, someone is more likely to feel inferior or insecure in relation to others. There is a tendency to adapt, to please, or to put one’s own wishes on the back burner. In conversations, this can lead to conflict avoidance, setting few boundaries, and difficulty in clearly expressing one’s own interests.
The third position is I’m okay, you’re not okay. Someone then sees themselves as better or stronger than the other person. The other person is more likely to be seen as difficult, weak, or untrustworthy. In communication, this manifests itself in reproachful or condescending reactions, a lot of criticism, and little real cooperation. This position often forms the breeding ground for power struggles and escalation.
The fourth position is “I’m not okay, you’re not okay.” From this perspective, there is little confidence in oneself and little confidence in others. The world is then quickly experienced as a place where little really succeeds or changes. This can manifest itself in cynicism, withdrawal, or a feeling of hopelessness.
Tip: Recognize what role you play during conflicts. Combine Berne’s Transactional Analysis with the Thomas-Kilmann model and the Conflict Styles Test for greater awareness and control in conversations.
Combinations of transactions within the transactional analysis
A transaction is an exchange of the previously mentioned strokes. According to Berne, there are three ways for this transaction between people to happen:

Figure 2 – Transactional Analysis combinations (Berne, 1958)
1: Complementary transaction
The equal and therefore effective communication between Child-Child, Adult-Adult, Parent-Parent.
2: Ulterior transaction
The equal communication, followed by for instance the Parent ego to the Child ego.
3: Crossed transaction
The communication transaction occurs between two different egos. On the one hand, one person for instance starts as the Parent ego and the other as the Child ego. This leads to inequality and different expectations. The communication is no longer effective and can even turn hostile. The combination of ego styles is then unfavourable.
The three different transactions in communication are not limited to verbal language and words alone. Tone of voice, body language and facial expressions are also incorporated.
Applying transactional analysis in conversations
Transactional analysis only becomes truly valuable when it is used in everyday conversations. The model helps to see what is happening beneath the surface and to make more conscious choices in how someone responds. Below is a practical way to apply TA in communication and collaboration.
The first step is to recognize which ego state someone is speaking from. Does a response sound primarily like Parent, Adult, or Child? A comment such as “This is the third time you’ve done this wrong” often comes from the Critical Parent. A response such as “Never mind, I’ll do it myself” can come strongly from the Adapted Child. An Adult response sounds different. For example, “We agreed that this would be finished yesterday. What do you need to finish it today?” Simply recognizing the tone and attitude helps you to distance yourself and not automatically go along with it.
The second step is to consciously choose to respond from the Adult. That means staying in the here and now, stating facts, asking questions, and looking for solutions. For example, if someone responds from the Critical Parent with “this report is not good again,” the other person will quickly slip into the Adapted Child or Rebellion. An Adult response could be to say that it is not good and ask them to indicate which parts they are missing or would like to change. This shifts the conversation from blame to content.
A third step is to use ego states as a check during difficult conversations. If a discussion gets stuck, the question can be asked: what is happening here at the TA level? Are two Parents talking to each other, or is one in Child and the other in Critical Parent? By naming this internally or carefully saying it out loud, there is often room to switch back to Adult Adult. For example, I notice that we are mainly criticizing each other, so let’s take a look at what the actual problem is that we want to solve.
TA also helps to reveal patterns in collaboration and teams. For example, some teams get stuck in a dynamic where a few people always take on the Parent role and others slip into the Adapted Child role. Decisions are not really made together and there is little ownership. By discussing this dynamic in terms of ego states, teams can explore which division of roles is more appropriate. The goal is not to suppress Parent or Child, but to strengthen the Adult position and to use the other states consciously and appropriately.
Finally, in coaching or leadership, TA can serve as a common language. A manager and employee can look back together on a difficult conversation and examine the ego states from which they were speaking at the time. This makes it less personal and less accusatory. Instead of saying, “You did this wrong,” a conversation arises about what happened in the interaction and how both parties can respond differently next time. In this way, transactional analysis becomes a practical lens for making conversations more equal, clearer, and more effective, step by step.
Recommended literature and books on Transactional Analysis
This literature lays bare the fundamentals of Transactional Analysis with razor-sharp precision. It shows how ego states, transactions, life scripts, and life positions work and provides both theoretical clarity and practical tools. A powerful mix of classic and modern insights that makes TA immediately understandable and effectively applicable in communication, coaching, and teams.
- Berne, E. (1964). Games People Play: The Psychology of Human Relationships. New York, NY: Grove Press. → The classic foundation for Transactional Analysis, in which Berne introduces the concepts of transactions, games, and psychological patterns. Essential for a clear understanding of the foundations and dynamics of TA.
- Berne, E. (1961). Transactional Analysis in Psychotherapy. New York, NY: Grove Press. → Describes TA in its most original form and explains how parent, adult, and child ego states are formed and used in communication.
- Berne, E. (1957). Ego states in psychotherapy. American Journal of Psychotherapy, 11(2), 293–309. → Introduces the ego state model that forms the basis for virtually all TA applications and communication models.
- Clarkson, P. (1991). Transactional analysis psychotherapy: A relational perspective. Routledge. → Provides a modern psychotherapeutic interpretation of TA and shows how relationships and interactions are central to development and communication.
- English, F. (1977). The substitution factor in script formation. Transactional Analysis Journal, 7(2), 111–115. → Explains how scripts arise and how they draw people into predictable interaction patterns.
- Ernst, F. H. (1971). The OK Corral: The grid for get-on-with. Transactional Analysis Journal, 1(4), 231–240. → Provides a clear model of life positions that directly ties in with OK theory within TA.
- Karpman, S. B. (1968). Fairy tales and script drama analysis. Transactional Analysis Bulletin, 7(26), 39–43. → Well-known extension within TA on scripts and drama dynamics, useful for understanding behavioral patterns and role choices within communication.
- Steiner, C. (1974). Scripts people live: Transactional analysis of life scripts. Grove Press. → Examines how unconscious patterns and life scripts guide communication styles and choices, allowing TA to be applied more deeply.
- Stewart, I., & Joines, V. (2008). Transactional Analysis – the handbook for personal and professional use. Amsterdam, NL: SWP Publishing. → Provides a modern and accessible explanation of all TA concepts and is one of the most widely used Dutch-language standard works for professionals and coaches.
- Thunissen, M., & de Graaf, A. (2013). Textbook on Transactional Analysis. Amsterdam, NL: Boom Publishers. → Connects theory to practice with clear diagrams, examples, and case studies. A strong foundation for those who want to apply TA in coaching, counseling, and teams.
- James, M., & Jongeward, D. (1971). Born to Win: Transactional Analysis with Gestalt Experiments. Reading, MA: Addison-Wesley. → Combines TA with experiential work and shows how you can actively develop ego states and behavioral choices.
- Harris, T. A. (1969). I’m OK – You’re OK. New York, NY: Harper & Row. → Accessible book that clarifies the concept of life positions and explains how TA helps people communicate more equitably and effectively.
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4 responses to “Transactional Analysis: the Theory and Examples”
Great resource for what Im learning . Currently taking Therapeutic Modalities and Counselling Skills. Is there anything on the Stages of Human Development that Im able to access?
Thanks for the great concise breakdown of the information.
Jim
Hi Jim, thank you for your comment. We have an article on the Sigmund Freud Theory that gives insight on the Psychological Stages of Human Development. If you have other suggestions, please let us know so we can set-up an article on that theory or topic. Kind regards, Vincent
Your explanation is easy to understand and more precise.
Thank you for your comment, Juanit.